


(Without) The Key to Your Heart

by howl-to-the-wind (greenleaf)



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, F/M, Friends With Benefits, M/M, One Night Stands, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-10
Updated: 2013-11-10
Packaged: 2018-01-01 01:37:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1038796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greenleaf/pseuds/howl-to-the-wind
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For this prompt: <i>Derek & Stiles have girlfriends but they had a one-night stand. Stiles is a selfish jerk and Derek started to have feelings.</i></p><p>“Let’s take this secret to the grave, shall we?” Stiles asked, eyebrow raised and with just the hint of sultriness in his voice.</p><p>“I’m not objecting,” Derek said, nuzzling his face into Stiles’ neck.</p><p>“And I was hoping for round two,” Stiles said, letting out a soft purr. “Or three. Or five.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	(Without) The Key to Your Heart

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this story a few years back when I was in a different fandom and decided to rewrite it for Teen Wolf. It fits Sterek much better anyway.
> 
> Angst. All the angst. Even if I suck at angst.
> 
> Not beta-ed.

Derek wasn’t all too surprised that it finally happened to him, getting drunk off his ass at one of the local frat parties and stumbling into his dorm room with someone that was neither his roommate nor his girlfriend. He didn’t have to worry about Boyd walking in on him though. If anything, Boyd was discreet and he’d probably just turn around and walk right out of the room. As for his girlfriend, she was spending the weekend over at her sister’s place and was clear out of campus.

Derek wasn’t that wasted not to know who he took home that night, so when he woke up the next morning, he was pleased and surprised to see Stiles still in his room, seated by the window and reading .

“Mor-” Derek groaned, his head pounding. “Damn migraine.”

The laughter that greeted him pierced through his headache. He felt the bed dip and cool fingers caressed Derek’s aching temple as Stiles’ upside down smiling face greeted him.

Stiles Stilinski was a Lit major two years below Derek, who was taking up Mechanical Engineering. They knew each other through a couple of mutual friends.

Derek might have had a thing for other male for quite a while now.

Derek burrowed his head in the side of Stiles’ thigh. Stiles shifted his position until he was leaning back on the wall, feet dangling on the edge of the bed, and Derek’s head on his lap. He never once paused in massaging Derek’s temple.

“How can you be ok in the morning?” Derek murmured.

Stiles grinned. “I have a ridiculously high alcohol tolerance, was hardly buzzed last night while you seemed like you were wasted til July.”

“I feel like I was taken advantage of.”

Stiles let out a snort. “You can say that if you’re the one who has another guy’s dick up your ass.”

Derek opened an eye lazily to look at him. “Did it hurt?”

“At first,” Stiles shrugged. “You’re very big.” He licked his lips, waggling his eyebrows. Derek smirked.

Derek settled onto Stiles’ lap. “I’d have thought the post-sex, morning-after talk would be more awkward,” he admitted.

Stiles turned to running his fingers through Derek’s hair. He shrugged. “I know. I don’t usually stay until the morning.”

“So why did you?”

“Last night was pretty epic,” Stiles smirked with no hint of shame at all. His red lips matched the litany of bruises and hickeys across his torso.

Derek only then noticed Stiles’ attire, a pair of Derek’s boxers. He glanced across the room to see his drawer opened.

“You’re soiling a pair of fresh boxers, asshole.” Derek looked up to glare at Stiles.

Stiles rolled his eyes. “First of all, I haven’t jerked off so it’s not soiled… yet. And second, I was cold.”

“You could have cuddled with me,” Derek said, running a hand through the waistband of the clothing. He noticed Stiles’ skin shiver a little at the touch.

“I don’t usually cuddle with my one-night stands,” Stiles said, sliding down to nestle over Derek’s naked body. “I have a girlfriend, you know.”

“So do I,” Derek said.

“She wasn’t at the party last night.”

“So was mine.”

“People saw us together.”

“I know.”

“But she believes everything I say.”

“Same.”

They looked at each other.

“Let’s take this secret to the grave, shall we?” Stiles asked, eyebrow raised and with just the hint of sultriness in his voice.

“I’m not objecting,” Derek said, nuzzling his face into Stiles’ neck.

“And I was hoping for round two,” Stiles said, letting out a soft purr. “Or three. Or five.”

Derek slipped his hand inside the male’s boxers. He felt Stiles already half-hard in his hand.

“Thank God it’s Saturday,” Derek murmured against the milky skin of Stiles’ neck before nibbling at the skin. Stiles moaned and arched into his body.

At that time, Derek thought it was just one day of really hot sex. He’d get over it.

He was wrong.

* * *

What started out as one-night stand became, for lack of a better description, a total booty call for the rest of the semester.

When Stiles wanted some, all he had to do was drop by the Engineering department. By the second week since they first had sex, they’ve done it in all the bathrooms in the first floor. Stiles wanted to finish off all the bathrooms in Derek’s college. Not only did Stiles find the challenge a total turn-on, but they both had the stamina for it anyway.

That day, they were ready to start their foray into the second floor bathrooms.

Stiles was a little bit more responsive than usual day. He had to bite down onto his shirt to keep from making too much noise. Derek grinned, thrusting deeper into the trembling male. Derek didn’t have afternoon classes that day, which Stiles knew when he had called him up to have a nice romp. Since almost the entire college was having classes, nobody had walked in on them. Yet. The thought of someone walking in on them made the both of them even hotter.

“Fuck.” Stiles let his shirt slip through his teeth. “Fuck. Fuck.” He repeated the word several times as he held onto the stall door, sweaty palms almost losing their grip.

“We’re doing that right now,” Derek said, lifting Stiles’ hips higher against the door. Both of their pants were already discarded on the floor. Derek still had his shirt on while Stiles’ polo shirt was half-open, giving Derek a sexy view of his chest. He leaned forward and licked a drop of sweat dripping down his chest.

Stiles mewled loudly before biting down on his lip. Derek’s thrusts slowed in pace, making Stiles glare at him.

“F-Faster,” Stiles ordered breathily. Derek gave him a challenging grin. Before Stiles could say anything, there was the sound of a ringing phone.

“Damn it.” Stiles pulled out his phone from his breast pocket. Derek shifted his weight to carry all of Stiles’ as he checked the call.

Stiles showed Derek the caller ID, frowning deeply. It was his girlfriend.

“Hey, babe,” he said, surprising Derek with a stable voice.

A well-aimed thrust had Stiles almost dropping his phone.

“Shit!”

“N-Nothing’s wrong. I just had a little a…” The word got prolonged as Derek rolled his hips agonizingly slow. He bit back a hiss. “…a-accident.” He managed to stutter the word out just barely.

“I-I’ll explain everything l-later. Love you,” Stiles said, almost tripping over his words as several thrusts from Derek were making him reach his boiling point. He snapped the phone shut.

Derek’s lips were on him in a moment as they both reached their orgasm. Stiles dropped the phone and it thankfully landed on the pants strewn across the floor.

They stayed there for a moment, breaths harsh and ragged. Derek kissed him deeply before pulling out softly and letting go of Stiles only when the other male can stand steady on his feet.

Stiles looked down at his chest and legs, strewn with cum and sweat. “This is going to be a bitch to clean.”

“I can lick it off,” Derek offered, smirking. “But that’ll take a while.”

Stiles sighed. “I would have loved that,” he murmured. When he picked up his phone and his pants, he merely rolled his eyes.

“You sure don’t do well in relationships,” Derek commented, tying off the condom and tossing it in the bin. He grabbed some tissue and cleaning off the mess on Stiles’ stomach. “Why do you have a girlfriend again?”

“Beats me,” Stiles said, and Derek could hear the underlying tone of truth in his voice. Stiles let out a giggle when Derek kissed his stomach. “Our mothers set us up and things happened.”

“How long have you two been together?” Derek asked as he finished cleaning Stiles off. The male shimmied into his pants as Derek cleaned himself up.

“A year,” Stiles said, wrinkling his nose. “You?”

“High school sweethearts,” Derek said as they both fixed their shirts and pants. “Two years.”

“Thank God I have a jacket. I don’t have a spare shirt,” Stiles muttered as they walked out of the stall. He looked at his sweaty polo. “And thank you for shaving by the way. The stubble burn would have been killer.”

“Anytime,” Derek said, laughing.

Stiles splashed water on his face and checked his lips. He had to think of a good excuse for his bruised lips. Derek didn’t need to fix himself up too much. His dorm was nearby and he can shower and cool down before his dinner date. They exited the bathroom and managed to make it out of the building without getting spotted.

“Gotta go,” Stiles said. He smiled. “Thanks for dropping by.”

“Anytime,” Derek said.

Stiles bounced off, but turned back one last time to send him a flying kiss. He didn’t turn away until Derek ‘caught’ it.

On the way back to his dorm, Derek called his girlfriend and said he was too tired to go out that night and, without waiting for her reply, fell asleep dreaming of Stiles.

Derek realized he might have invested a little more in this than he thought.

* * *

Weeks passed and they kept up their charade. Around others, they were good friends. When they were with their girlfriends, they were attentive and sweet and gentlemanly, promised their loyalty and love.

But when it was just them, Stiles and Derek, Derek felt like his insides were smoldering.

He had never felt more alive, freer, more himself, with each kiss and touch.

But it was just a game, just a game.

He had to keep reminding himself of that as he held on to the pieces of his heart that was unknowingly being taken away by the male underneath him.

“Derek.” Stiles whispered his name, breathy and laced with lust. “Harder. More.”

As they pressed their bodies closer and closer, Derek was almost convinced they were one and the same person. He thrust himself into Stiles harder, deeper, loving the way the younger male’s legs tightened around his waist, his fingernails dig into his shoulders, and the gasps that erupted from that luscious mouth.

I love you.

Derek was so shocked by his thoughts, he stopped moving.

Stiles let out a whine, raising and lowering his hips to urge Derek to move. Derek didn’t.

“D-Derek?”

Derek looked down. Stiles looked up at him, concern flashing across his face despite the obvious underlying pain from withholding release.

“A-Are you ok?” Stiles asked. “W-What’s wro-”

Derek kissed him, hard and bruising, and raised his hips. Stiles let out a cry against his mouth from the pleasure overtaking his entire body.

Did he love him? Really?

A few minutes later, they lied down beside each other, spent and warm and fulfilled. Stiles flashed Derek a smile and Derek brushed a finger against the other’s lips. The smile was truer than any other smile he’s seen from the male.

Did he love him? Really?

When Stiles crawled over him, touching himself and all the while giving Derek full view, Derek laughed and enjoyed the show.

Yes. He did. He does.

* * *

The day Derek realized things were getting serious, at least for him, was the day Boyd said something. And Boyd never said something unless it was serious.

“If you’re bored, I saw Stiles at the library.”

Derek turned away from his laptop to look at Boyd, who just came in smelling of Erica’s cologne.

“What are you talking about?” Derek asked. He and Stiles had been more than careful to hide their sex-capades.

“I know you two have been fooling around for about three and a half months now,” Boyd said.

Boyd wasn’t the nosy type which was why he and Derek get along fine, but the silent male was sharp and always knew more than he let on.

Derek stood up. “Boyd-”

“Don’t give me that talk about how you two have girlfriends,” Boyd said. “I know all that and frankly, it’s not really my business, but you’re my friend.” Boyd’s eyes narrowed as discomfort came through his face. “Just be careful, ok? I know you, Derek.”

Without waiting for a reply, Boyd walked out.

* * *

“I have to go,” Derek said, the same thing he’s been saying half an hour now since the third round of some mind-blowing sex.

“Do you have to?” Stiles asked, which was also the same thing he’s been saying for the past half hour.

“Yes,” Derek said, loving the way Stiles’ thigh brushed against his. “I have a date.”

Stiles sighed. “Fine.” He didn’t make any move to get off of Derek though.

Derek would have stayed there the whole day, but he had a date. If he didn’t get going now, he’d be late. He lifted a leg and changed their positions, Stiles letting out a squeak. Derek made sure to catch his head before laying him down on the hardwood floor. Derek laughed at Stiles’ pout.

“Ugh. Fine.” Stiles let Derek slip out his arms.

Derek grabbed his pants and shirt, putting them on. Stiles watched him and Derek avoided looking him in the eye or else he know he’d blush. Ever since Boyd called out his real feelings for Stiles, Derek found himself acting more and more smitten.

“Call me when you get back to your dorm, ok?” Stiles said.

“Sure.” Derek grabbed his jacket, not forgetting to sling a blanket over the naked male on the floor. When they ended up on the floor, he wasn’t so sure. “And don’t forget to clean up.”

Stiles laughed, sitting up, the blankets pooling around his waist. Derek avoided looking at him too long.

Derek waved over his shoulder. “Later.”

* * *

A couple of hours later, Stiles was trying to catch his breath as he slid and stumbled down the small hill towards the figure stretched underneath a huge oak tree. It was near the edge of the campus so they were the only two people around.

“You could have found someplace closer to my dorm, you asshole,” Stiles said, sitting down beside Derek with a huff. “I’ve never been so… Derek?”

Derek looked up at the night sky peeking through the foliage above their heads.

“Penny for your thoughts?” Stiles asked, stretching his body over Derek like he always did.

“My girlfriend thought I was cheating on her.”

“It’s not like that’s not true,” Stiles said, scoffing.

Derek didn’t look at him and kept his gaze upwards. “I broke up with her.”

“What?” Stiles pushed himself up onto his arms and looked down at him. “Why?”

“Well, it’s not like she didn’t get it right,” Derek said, finally looking at Stiles. Stiles had an unreadable expression on his face. He was quiet and Derek continued. “I didn’t tell her anything though and she took it better than I expected. I’m not sad about breaking up with her.”

“Because of me?” Stiles asked, eyes avoiding Derek’s gaze. “Derek, you shouldn’t have. I don’t-”

“It’s not you,” Derek said. “It’s been going downhill even before you came into the picture. If you hadn’t come along, I would have stayed with her longer so I guess you just made me realize it sooner.”

Stiles looked him in the eye and saw the truth in that. He settled into Derek’s arms.

“I don’t love you,” Stiles murmured to Derek’s shoulder.

Derek kept his eyes trained upwards. “I’m not asking you to,” he replied, his own lie piercing his heart.

“You are,” Stiles said. “Every time we have sex. I feel it.”

Derek didn’t reply to that.

“I can’t give you that,” Stiles whispered.

“You don’t have to.” Derek sat up, pushing Stiles to sit up as well. “I just…” He looked away. “This has to stop.”

Stiles suddenly gripped his arm.

“No.” Stiles’ voice was steely and demanding, a harsh tone Derek had never heard before. Stiles kept his eyes on his lap.

Derek tried to shake him off, but Stiles’ grip was unmoving.

“Stiles, I can’t do this anymore.”

“I want you.” Stiles didn’t look up, but Derek could feel the weight of his words. “I don’t love you but I want you. I don’t want you to leave.”

“You’re being selfish,” Derek said, voice soft but full of feeling. “And spoiled.”

“I am selfish and spoiled,” Stiles said, eyes narrowing at Derek. “And I don’t want you to go anywhere.”

“You can’t have everything,” Derek said. “You can’t have us both.”

“So now I have to choose?” Stiles let go of him. “You didn’t seem to mind that when we first had sex.”

“Because at the time, I didn’t know I would fall in love with you,” Derek said, making Stiles wince. “And I’m not asking you to choose because I’m the one who’s leaving.”

“No.”

“Stiles-”

Stiles pounced on him, pushing him down on the ground and kissing him harsh and painful. Derek tried to push him back, but Stiles clung to him, fingers tight around Derek’s wrists and legs firm at his sides. When Stiles finally pulled away, they were both breathing hard.

“Don’t leave.” Stiles’ voice cracked. “Don’t leave.” He repeated it like a mantra, voice cracking each time.

Derek felt a pang in his heart. He pulled Stiles to his chest.

You are spoiled and selfish.

Derek’s heart was already in pieces, but what was one more crack in a sea of thousands?

* * *

Derek didn’t leave. He was always there, at Stiles’ beck and call, scrambling not to give away the last few pieces of his heart. It didn’t always work.

Derek tried, constantly reminding himself not to give in, not to believe, not to love.

But it’s true what they say. Falling in love makes you weak.

* * *

Derek was there by accident. He had forgotten his filer so he had to go back and get it and when he arrived, he noticed the door to his room was slightly open.

That was odd. Boyd didn’t have classes today and he was complaining of a headache, wanting to stay in. He got near enough to the door to hear.

“Stop doing this to him.”

Boyd? Was someone with him?

“This isn’t any of your business.”

Derek froze. He realized with a start that he had forgotten to tell Stiles he was busy today and that Boyd would be in the room if he ever dropped by.

“Yes, it is,” Boyd said. “I kept your secret from everybody and you’re both my friends. That damn well makes it my business.”

“Then go tell everyone. No one’s stopping you,” Stiles hissed.

Derek leaned back against the hallway, listening to them argue. They weren’t shouting, but their voices were sharp and biting.

Boyd’s voice was softer. “You know I won’t tell anyone. You and Derek are my friends and if anything, I would have gladly stayed out of your way, but I didn’t know you would go this far. I thought you knew better, Stiles.”

There was silence.

“It’s complicated, ok?”

“Complicated? Derek is not a play thing, Stiles. If you don’t want this, let him go.”

“I can’t. I don’t know why but I can’t.”

“Why are you so goddamn selfish?” Boyd’s voice took on a forceful tone that made Derek wince. “Do you even feel something for him?”

Minutes passed without a response.

Derek walked away.

* * *

Derek looked down at the male in his arms. Stiles was sleeping soundly, hair tousled and skin warm and smooth. There were no marks on his skin, just his bruised lips that were still a shade of red despite the cold shower he took before bed. They usually napped a bit after having sex but Derek had insisted. He even changed the sheets, but Stiles was too sleepy to notice.

It was better this way. It was better to leave with no sign that he was even there. No matter how much he loved Stiles, he was only human. Besides, staying hurts more.

Derek propped himself up on one elbow, watching as Stiles turned his way, seeking his warmth. A smile tugged at his lips when Stiles’ head landed on his pillow. He snuggled to the warmth and scent it offered. Derek stroked his cheek with a finger.

To say he would miss this, would miss Stiles, would be an understatement.

He placed one last kiss on his forehead before gently slipping out of bed. He made sure to tuck Stiles in tightly. He put on his clothes, checked to make sure everything was in place and nothing was forgotten. Pulling out a random receipt from his pocket, he scribbled a quick note.

_I love you._  
 _Goodbye._

* * *

Derek never got a call from Stiles again.

It was hard at first, but he put himself into his studies and made himself too busy to think or stay in one place too long. He joined the lacrosse team and put his all into their games. He got a part-time job at a bookstore. He stayed away from the party scene. In a way, it was to avoid Stiles. In another, it was to avoid getting attached with any partygoers.

It wasn’t long before their closest friends caught on. Even then, Derek thought they had their suspicions, even though Boyd kept his lips sealed. Even someone dense would be able to catch on to almost five months of fooling around.

He still saw Stiles around. They were in the same campus after all and had mutual friends. Boyd remained as impartial as he had always been. Scott, Stiles’ roommate and best friend, became Derek’s teammate in the lacrosse team and they became one of their deadliest combos in the field. Isaac was closer to Derek than Stiles, but he didn’t mind hanging out with the other male once in a while for ice cream or conversation. Erica was more Stiles’ friend, but she still said hi to Derek in the halls.

After two months, Derek finally had his life back on track.

Derek looked up at the darkening skies as he walked back to his dormitory after work. To be honest, he hadn’t gotten over the whole Stiles thing, but he was more or less all right.

He rounded the block, still in a daze, only to almost bump into someone.

Stiles looked just as surprised as he did.

There was silence. This was the first time they’ve been this close after two months, and the first time they’ve held each other’s gazes for more than a second.

Stiles licked his lips. His voice was barely above a whisper. “H-Hi.”

Derek cleared his throat. “Hi.”

Stiles looked away, rubbing the back of his neck. “How… er… how are you doing?”

“I’m good. Busy. I just came from work,” Derek said.

“I know,” Stiles said. He caught himself and added. “I mean, Isaac mentioned you working the shelves and all that.”

“How about you?” Derek asked. “Erica told me you were invited to deejay for the school’s radio station.”

Stiles nodded. “Uh, yeah. Allison, Scott’s girlfriend, asked me to sit in with her for a session one time and they thought I could duo with her. It’s fun.”

“That sounds good. I think you’ll do well.” And Derek meant that. Stiles always had a gift for gabbing.

“So…” Stiles licked his lips. “Where are you headed?”

“Dorm,” Derek said. “I have lacrosse practice tomorrow. You?”

“I…um …I have a date,” Stiles said, avoiding his eye.

Derek felt a little pinch in his chest. “Oh, I see. Are you… ok?” That wasn’t what he wanted to say, but Stiles got it.

“Yeah,” he said, nodding slowly. “We’re good.”

Derek nodded, knowing he wasn’t part of the ‘we’. He would never be.

“So, anyway, I should go,” Derek said, side-stepping the male. “I guess I’ll… see you around.”

“Derek.”

Derek stopped at the whisper. He felt warm arms wrap around him.

“I’m sorry.” Stiles whispered to his back, voice full of sincerity.

Derek nodded. “I know.” And he did.

All along, Stiles was just being Stiles. Derek just couldn’t help falling in love with him, despite the games.

“I’m really sorry,” Stiles repeated.

Derek turned around, seeing the male’s downcast face. He was always weak to that look. He reached up to cup his cheek gently.

“I know,” he repeated.

“I do care about you, a lot,” Stiles said. “I just-”

“No, really, I get it,” Derek said. “I guess things just didn’t really work out between us.”

Stiles buried his face in Derek’s shirt, breathing ragged.

Derek held him tight, heart aching.

In the end, they just probably weren’t meant to be.

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t really do angst, but ah well. And it’s probably a bit unrealistic that no one caught them going at it, but again, ah well.
> 
> And did I mention no happy endings?


End file.
